Navigating a Tumultuous Relationship with a Narcissist Through Vipassana Meditation and Hypnotherapy.
If you are reading this, it probably means that you are in some form of relationship with a narcissist or you know someone who is. In brief, narcissists exhibit a range of behaviors, including entitlement, gaslighting, over-involvement with drama, showing disdain when you are sick, not listening to you, dismissing your feelings and point of view, and more. These behaviors, as highlighted by psychologist Dr. Ramani Durvasula, create an emotionally volatile environment that can be deeply frustrating and hurtful.
Let’s remember, folks exhibiting narcissistic personality traits can be incredibly inconsistent and cruel. It may feel unjust whenever you engage with them because they have a way to turn things around, making you feel the cause of all problems. This may often feel like being “erased” by someone, because they often discount your presence in the conversation. This can lead to a state where you feel like you are walking on eggshells, trying not to upset this person or just utterly shocked, hurt and deeply confused by the irrationality of their behaviors, that looks like a tantrum from an 8 year old.
This article is about building a resilience muscle to help you deal with their emotional abuse. We will look at the power and uses of Vipassana meditation and its underlying philosophy that are crucial tools for this.
The Role of Vipassana Meditation
Vipassana meditation helps you understand and implement a core idea: non-attachment. This means not getting overly attached to or craving their positive affirmations when they are charming, nor getting overly upset by the negativity that comes from them. It's a practice of maintaining neutrality to either of their borderline personality sides.
Why Non-Attachment Matters
People often say that narcissistic people can be very loving and attentive at the beginning of a relationship, which is what often draws you in. However, often once they have secured your attention and affection, they may turn on you with disdain, negativity, criticism, and emotional cruelty. You experience a cycle of hot and cold behavior. In the beginning, if you are new to dealing with a narcissist, you might crave the good moments and wait for them to return. But you must remember that showing them you chase these good moments or want their approval only reinforces their behavior. Narcissistic personalities often excel at giving and withdrawing affection, a tactic that works particularly well on people with low self-esteem or lacking personal boundaries.
Building Resilience Through Vipassana
Observation Without Reaction: Vipassana teaches you to observe your thoughts and emotions without reacting to them by using a continuous mental scan of the body. This practice is essential when dealing with a narcissist, as it helps you maintain emotional balance regardless of their behavior.
Detachment from Outcomes: By practicing Vipassana, you learn to detach from the outcomes of interactions with the narcissist. Whether they are being charming or cruel, you remain centered and unaffected by their emotional swings.
Self-Awareness and Inner Strength: Meditation enhances self-awareness, helping you recognize patterns in your responses to the narcissist. This awareness allows you to build inner strength and resilience, making it easier to maintain your composure.
Breaking the Cycle: The practice of non-attachment helps you break the cycle of craving the good times and fearing the bad times. You start to see the narcissist’s behavior as a movie, understanding that their actions are reflections of their instability, not your worth.
Implementing Vipassana in Daily Life
To effectively navigate a tumultuous relationship with a narcissist, incorporate these Vipassana principles into your daily life:
Daily Meditation Practice: Set aside time each day for Vipassana meditation. Between 10 to 30 minutes a day. Download our app to start practicing it for free.
Mindful Observation: Throughout the day, practice observing your thoughts and emotions without reacting. Notice how interactions with the narcissist affect you and remind yourself to stay neutral.
Emotional Detachment: When the narcissist exhibits charming or cruel behavior, remind yourself not to get emotionally attached to their good days or react to their bad days. Stay grounded in your own self-worth.
Self-Compassion: Practice self-compassion. Acknowledge the difficulty of your situation and be kind to yourself as you navigate it.
How to start?
Download the HypnoCloud app and listen to our ten-minute Vipassana Mediation and How to Control Difficult people in Your life audio sessions. Go to Featured Session to listen to our audios for free. Go to the iPhone or Google Play Stores to download the app. Or book a hypnotherapy session with your support guide, hypnotherapist and ICF Coach Elena Mosaner.
Dealing with a narcissist is challenging, but Vipassana meditation provides a powerful tool to build resilience and maintain your emotional balance. By practicing non-attachment and staying grounded, you can navigate the tumultuous relationship with strength and clarity. Remember, you are not defined by the narcissist’s behavior; your worth comes from within.
Elena Mosaner, MS, is a Certified Hypnotherapist, Master NLP Practitioner, and ICF Certified Coach with over 15 years of experience in helping people with habit-building, conquering fears, confidence-building, performance, and other personal development and wellness issues. She is also an author and the founder of HypnoCloud, a digital hypnotherapy app. Contact us for your complimentary consultation.